The behavioural habits that hold successful leaders back

Executive overview

Successful people fall into a superstition trap: they assume the behaviours that made them successful caused their success, and that the same behaviours will keep working. They won't. As leaders rise, technical skills matter less and behavioural patterns matter more.

Marshall Goldsmith's framework — drawn from his book What Got You Here Won't Get You There — identifies 21 habits that derail otherwise high-performing leaders. The core discipline: before speaking, stop and ask "Is it worth it?"

The behaviours that made you successful are often the exact behaviours holding you back now.

The superstition trap

• Success doesn't mean every behaviour is correct — you succeed because of some things and in spite of others.
• Past success does not guarantee future success; the context changes, the role changes.
• The shift into senior leadership is a job change even when the organisation stays the same.
• Individual achievers focus on themselves; great leaders focus on others.

Winning too much

• Winning too much is the most common behavioural problem in successful people and underlies nearly every other habit.
• Winners want to win regardless of stakes — trivial arguments, dinner choices, conversations that don't matter.
• Classic test: you lose the restaurant argument, the food is bad. Do you critique it? You should eat the food and enjoy the night.
• Needing to win every exchange destroys goodwill without gaining anything.

Adding too much value

• Adding too much value: the impulse to improve every idea before endorsing it.
• When a boss adds to a direct report's idea, quality may rise 5% but the employee's commitment drops 50% — it's no longer their idea.
• JP Garnier (CEO, GlaxoSmithKline): "My suggestions become orders." At senior levels, even casual input lands as a directive.
• The fix: breathe, then ask "Is it worth it?" Garnier found that ~50% of the time, it wasn't.
• At home: will this comment improve the relationship? If no, don't say it.

Starting sentences with "no", "but", or "however"

• These words signal: I'm not listening, disregard what you just said.
• One client said "but" 21 times in 90 minutes and had no idea — he was fined $20 per instance.
• The pattern extends to agreement: "No, I think that's a great idea" — the "no" communicates I already knew that.
• Practical filter: ignore everything before "but" or "however" in someone's sentence; what follows is what they actually mean.

Playing favourites

• Everyone claims to hate sycophants; most leaders unknowingly reward them.
• The dog test: in most households, the dog gets more unconditional positive recognition than the spouse or children — because the dog never pushes back.
• Good sycophants are invisible; leaders are caught off-guard by the subtle ones, not the obvious ones.
• Four questions to audit yourself: (1) How much do I think this person likes me? (2) How much are they like me? (3) What is their actual contribution? (4) How much positive recognition do I give them?
• If recognition tracks (1) and (2) more than (3), that is favouritism.

Excessive need to be me

• "That's just the way I am" is a self-stereotype, not a fixed fact.
• Leaders use it to excuse poor listening, poor recognition, or other changeable behaviours.
• Feeling like change is "acting" or "not really me" is an identity problem, not a capability problem.
• You were programmed to be a certain way — much of it is useful; some of it isn't. You can choose which parts to keep.
• Practical reframe: "In the past I didn't listen well. In the future I can listen better. I do not have an incurable genetic defect."

Goal obsession and achievement addiction

• Goal obsession is not itself a flaw; it becomes one when it disconnects from purpose and enjoyment.
• The myth: "Once I achieve X, I'll be happy." Achievement never delivers lasting peace — the next goal immediately replaces it.
• Albert Bourla (CEO, Pfizer): delivered the COVID vaccine, record employee engagement, record stock price — and his problem was already next year.
• From the Bhagavad Gita: never become attached to outcomes. Do your best; don't tie ego to results.
• Three elements of a great life: aspiration (higher purpose), ambition (achievement connected to that purpose), action (enjoyment of the day-to-day process).
• The audience for this podcast is not at risk of lacking ambition — the risk is that ambition is untethered from purpose and presence.

What has changed since the book was written

• Distraction is a larger issue now than in 2007 — constant technology and media barrage makes stopping to ask "is it worth it?" harder.
• Social media raises the stakes for every off-the-cuff remark at senior levels; anything said can be broadcast instantly.
• Workforce expectations have shifted dramatically — leaders are objectively better (less abusive, less discriminatory) but receive worse feedback because expectations have risen in parallel.