Overthinking, decision-making, and living by your values

Executive overview

Overthinking goes far beyond rumination and worry — it includes perfectionism, analysis paralysis, decision fatigue, and second-guessing. These patterns drain mental energy and carry a real opportunity cost.

The antidote is a combination of self-awareness, pre-made decisions, and values-based frameworks that remove the need to deliberate in the moment.

Deciding ahead of time — using your values as the filter — is the most effective way to short-circuit overthinking.

What overthinking actually looks like

• Repetitive, unhelpful thoughts that consume energy without producing output
• Perfectionism drives overthinking: seeking the "best" answer before acting
• Analysis paralysis from information overload — gathering beyond the point of usefulness
• Decision fatigue manifests as general overwhelm, not just big choices
• Small-scale triggers: hunger, tiredness, plan changes, money decisions
• Overthinking in one or two specific areas is common — and easy to miss

The perfectionism connection

• Perfectionism and overthinking are closely linked; most people don't see the connection
• Signs: procrastinating until conditions are perfect, eye goes straight to flaws, frequent second-guessing
• Naming perfectionism when it shows up deprives it of power
• Embrace an experimental mindset: any outcome is data, not a verdict
• Iterative approach lowers stakes — you don't have to get it right, just see what happens next

Building a values-based decision framework

• People with coherent, decisive lives consistently describe themselves as values-driven
• Articulating values explicitly — not just knowing them vaguely — enables faster decisions
• Pre-made decisions save mental energy for things that actually require thought
• Values can be practical rules, not just lofty principles: "If I need a book for work, I buy it"
• "Err on the side of showing up" is a value — it pre-decides a whole category of choices
• When actions consistently reflect stated values, decision-making becomes almost automatic

Auditing whether you live your values

• Saying you value something is not the same as living it out
• Check your calendar: does what you spend time on match what you say matters?
• Visual tools help — a colour-coded arts calendar shows at a glance whether a value is real
• If there's a gap between stated values and actual behaviour, either the value or the behaviour must change

Mental habits and autopilot

• Every repeated thought strengthens the neural circuit that produced it
• Replacing unhelpful patterns gradually rewires how the mind works
• Autopilot is valuable for low-stakes decisions; reserve mental energy for what matters
• Small reclamations compound — just as small destructions add up, so do small improvements
• The right question is often not the surface-level one: ask "what is really going on here?"