25 brutally honest Stoic reminders from Marcus Aurelius

Executive overview

Most people drift through life reacting to events, other people's opinions, and their own untamed emotions. Marcus Aurelius wrote to himself — not to an audience — which makes Meditations a rare record of a ruler fighting the same battles everyone fights.

The core move is always the same: distinguish what is in your control from what is not, then act on the former and release the latter.

You already have the power to choose your response — everything else is noise.

The people around you and your reactions to them

• People will be jealous, difficult, stupid. Go in with eyes open — but they can't implicate you in ugliness.
• You can commit an injustice by doing nothing. Inaction makes you complicit.
• Anger at the world is shouting into a void. The world is utterly indifferent to your grievance.
• The best revenge is not being like the person who wronged you. You already won.
• Losing your temper is weakness. Emotional self-command is strength.
• Stop trying to escape other people's faults. Work on your own.

Your opinions are the obstacle

• Anxiety is extrapolation. Stick with what is in front of you, not every bad thing that could happen.
• It's not unfortunate that this happened — it's fortunate. Your character is intact, and now you get to do something with it.
• Your thoughts dye your life. Negative defaults produce a negative reality.
• The obstacle is not the problem. Your orientation toward it is.
• When you do something good, the transaction is complete. You don't need the third thing: recognition.

What other people think of you

• The people whose approval you crave — examine their minds closely. They lose their power over you fast.
• You care more about strangers' opinions than your own. That is insane. Build an internal compass.
• Cheering is a clacking of tongues. Clapping is a smacking of hands. The crowd doesn't know what's good.
• Tie happiness to your own actions, not to what others do, say, or think. That is sanity.

Impermanence and what matters

• Run down all the famous names that came before you. They're forgotten. You will be too.
• Alexander the Great and his mule driver both died. A coffin was sufficient for both.
• Life is change. Every good thing came from change. You cannot escape it — only accept it.
• You're going to die. Let that determine what you do, say, and think right now.

How to live and act

• Eliminate the inessential constantly. When you do, you do the essential things better.
• Most of what you do is inessential. Ask of everything: is this necessary?
• You weren't made to be comfortable. People who love what they do wear themselves down doing it.
• Don't wait for Plato's Republic. That's not where you live. Be the change.
• Waste no more time arguing what a good person is like. Just be one.
• Stay precise in action, words, and thought. Focus on what's in your control. Treat everything as an opportunity to be your best.